November 21st, 2015 - The Tell-Tale Heart (1960)

I must have read Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart" at some point, but other than the main bullet point (guy fesses up to murder because he can still hear the heartbeat of his victim) I don't remember anything. I'm pretty sure it didn't involve a creepy loner named Edgar trying to woo his beautiful neighbor. But whatever - this adaptation still pretty much works, even though it has to try a little too hard to stretch the source material to feature length.

Laurence Payne plays Edgar, a librarian leading a mostly solitary life. He's got a big house with a maid, but other than the occasional social visit from his friend Carl, he prefers to be alone. That is, until the beautiful Betty moves in across the street. Edgar is smitten, but doesn't know how to go about getting to know her. He even asks Carl (a dashing, suave ladies man) "How do you talk to a girl?" So he's rather inexperienced, but also a little creepy. He conveniently can see into Betty's window from his bedroom, and follows her around town, only to ask her a question and then vanish. Nerves, I tell you!

November 14th, 2015 - Devil's Possessed (1974)

Somewhat oddly, I haven't come across many medieval horror flicks over the last year or so. Not like it's a huge genre or anything, but still. I think Devil's Possessed may be my first. It's a Spanish effort starring Paul Naschy as (the) Baron Gilles de Lancre. Many years ago, he was a noble and fair man, but because of some dabblings in the occult - as well as the (evil) influence of his (evil) wife - he's turned into an enemy of the people. For years now, the Baron has been collecting unfair taxes, ruling the peasants with an iron fist, and turning a blind eye to the pillaging done by his royal army.

Plus, he is mad with power, and will stop at nothing to rule all of the land. He's decided the only way he can do this is to turn lead into gold (of course). So his wife puts him in touch with the greatest alchemist in all the land. The alchemist tells the Baron that he must sacrifice maidens in a series of elaborate rituals. You get the idea that this alchemist guy is probably full of it, but the Baron doesn't catch on. So a-sacrificin' he goes.

November 8th, 2015 - Satan's Slave (1976)

Holy crap. I love that screen grab. I need that on my denim jacket! The rest of the movie can't live up to this title shot's lofty standards... but then again, what could? As long as you aren't expecting too much and have an affinity for 70's British Satan/cult films, you will probably have an okay time with Satan's Slave. (a.k.a Evil Heritage - both titles are pretty excellent.) There's nothing too crazy about the film and honestly, it's not altogether memorable. But it's still a decent enough time at the movies. Or on your couch, enjoying the Pure Terror Budget Set, as it were.

And one of the reasons it's not totally memorable is the plot. I swear "young woman goes out to a country estate and runs afoul of an evil cult" is the 1970's British equivalent to our present day "friends go out to party at a cabin in the woods." So hopefully, I'm not imposing any other movies onto this plot summary. I watched another very similar title shortly before this write-up, and am struggling to keep them separate. (Also, please note that I'm intentionally leaving out a big chunk of story. Not that I expect anyone to watch Satan's Slave, but I won't spoil the most memorable part of the film.)

November 3rd, 2015 - Grave of the Vampire (1972)

Grave of the Vampire is an early 70s vampire flick that changes up the typical vamp story just enough to be moderately entertaining. There's not much here to rave about, but it passes the time all right. Probably the most interesting thing about the film is how the first half-hour or so seems like a completely different movie from what comes next. I mean, both halves keep a serious tone (I'm not sure if there's even a joke in this film), but I guess it'd be like an extended prologue. It plays out like you get a bizarre short film, followed by a shorter, unconventional vampire movie. Say what you well about Grave of the Vampire, but at least the structure keeps it from being boring.

Early on in the film, a vampire rises from the grave and attacks a couple making out in their car. Yes, they go to the graveyard to make out. How romantic! The vampire cracks the man's back over a tombstone (it looks cool!) and then proceeds to drag the woman down into his open grave and rapes her. (You don't see this, thankfully.)  I'm trying to think of another vampire movie where I've seen this. There's almost always a sexual element to a vampire attack, but I don't remember ever seeing a vampire that's solely after sex. So that's different.

October 25th, 2015 - Point of Terror (1971)

Despite its place on the Pure Terror Budget Set - as well as being called Point of Terror, there is hardly anything terrifying about this film. Well, maybe star Peter Carpenter's outfits and stageshow... more on that later. But it's hardly a horror film. There is one out of nowhere scene of hacking and slashing, but it honestly felt like something that was just added after the fact when they realized there is no way to effectively market this film. (The poster on imdb says "A Super Shocker" and has a masked man brandishing a knife -  that's just flat out intentionally misleading.) Point of Terror isn't overtly bad... it's just a sort of odd tale about a singer guy who will do anything for stardom. But will love get in the way?

September 9th, 2015 - Frankenstein '80 (1972)

That's some high quality framing

Goofy and rapey is a very odd vibe for a film to shoot for. The two just don't go together under any circumstances, and I don't think even the boldest and/or most talented filmmaker would even try. But that doesn't stop Frankenstein '80, an Italian exploitation flick that is semi-interesting as a gory novelty, but is certainly not a very good movie.

It's a film that asks the bold question - what if early-70's Dr. Frankenstein put gonads into his creation (called "Mosiac" here), and the organ caused the monster to become not only murderer, but also a rapist? Sounds fun, yeah?

September 8th, 2015 - Death Warmed Up (1984)

Death Warmed Up is a pretty crazy Island of Dr. Moreau/zombie mash up that's surprisingly entertaining. The hit-to-miss ratio on this Pure Terror Budget set has been solid enough that I'm starting to expect good movies - or at least entertaining ones. And Death Warmed Up fits the bill - not "good," but a fun enough time. While the overarching story is relatively simple and easy to follow (dude goes to island for revenge on a crazy doctor), it's not a particularly well-told tale - it feels a little sloppy at times, but not enough to derail what is a mostly good time. It's a high-energy New Zealand import, made several years before Peter Jackson brought the New Zealand horror-comedy to international fame. Like Jackson's early films, there is mad-cap craziness to Death Warmed Up that is hard not to enjoy. While it's not as intentionally humorous as Dead Alive or the like, it's got some solid WTF moments/effects that will have you half-covering your eyes and half-laughing.

The film is about a young man named Michael who is hypnotized by Evil Doctor Archer Howell (I think). Dr. Archer claims to be doing very risky brain surgeries in the name of bringing immortality to his patients, but he seems to be more cut out to make psycho-zombies. Anyways, Michael's Father is a rival of Dr. Archer - i.e. he believes in being responsible and the scientific method and all that boring stuff. So Dr. Archer hypnotizes Michael and makes him kill his parents. Micheal is found guilty of the crime and sentenced to a mental institution.

July 21st, 2015 - Terror-Creatures from the Grave (1965)

So that's a pretty good title. The actual film isn't as goofy as the title makes it sound though. It's a mostly seriously told story of revenge... from beyond the grave! Terror-Creatures is not an outstanding film - it's a little sloppy at times and feels a bit hastily put together. (And hastily dubbed.) But considering the source (Pure Terror Budget Set) I have to look at it as a nice surprise.

Terror-Creatures mostly takes place on an estate in a small town at an undetermined (for me) time. Telephones are considered new technology, for what it's worth. 1930's, maybe? If you can figure out when "getting an owl stuck in the engine" (?) was a common car problem, maybe you can figure it out. Anyways, it's about Albert, a lawyer who gets a letter from Count Hauff to help him get his will in order. When Albert arrives at Hauff's estate, he is welcomed by the Count's daughter Corrine and his wife Cleo (Barbara Steele)... and they inform him that the Count has been dead for nearly a year to the day. The letter clearly had the Count's seal on it... so what gives?

July 7th, 2015 - The Devil's Nightmare (1971)

So what I *think* I have on my hands is the English dubbed version of the Italian release of the Italian/Belgian La plus longue nuit du diablo (The Longest Night of the Devil) - it's French (and official) title. The Italian version (above) translates as the Terrifying Night of the Devil, whereas us English-speakers get The Devil's Nightmare. Anyways, the film was a really nice surprise from the Pure Terror budget set. You never really know what you're going to get from these sorts of things - it could be anything from a bland, cheapo time-waster (here's looking at you, The Dungeon of Harrow) to a legitimately solid well-executed horror/thriller. What I *definitely* don't expect? Baby-stabbing and softcore porn. Let me explain.

The Devil's Nightmare starts out in 1945 Berlin. Baron von Rhoneberg is (I'd guess) a higher ranking official in the German army - and he's holed up in a bunker somewhere with his wife, who is just about to give birth. Bombs are dropping overhead, and the end of the war is near. Rhoneberg's wife dies in childbirth, but the midwife manages to save the child. Rhoneberg asks repeatedly "is it a boy? Is it a boy?" - but the midwife says no, it's a girl. Rhoneberg sends everyone away from them and proceeds to stab the baby. WTF? It's not really brutal or anything - I mean, really, he's just stabbing the pile of sheets next to the baby - but still. The concept of it is particularly nasty, and something I don't think I've ever come across in a film before. So thanks for showing me something new, The Devil's Nightmare.

June 28th, 2015 - The Thirsty Dead (1974)

The Thirsty Dead is a rather bland and inoffensive cult horror film. (As in, it's about a cult - there's nothing exciting or weird enough here to give it a passionate following.) Hearing that title, you could reasonably expect a zombie or even a vampire film, but what you get instead is an "isolated cult (kind of) kills people to become immortal" film. The story in and of itself isn't bad, but overall the whole endeavor is kind of cheap looking and hokey - it has a real TV-movie feel and never really succeeds in being scary or troubling. The Thirsty Dead is never really outright bad - it's just kind of there.

It's about four young women in Manilla who who are all kidnapped by strange dudes in monk robes. The four don't know each other, but they quickly become friends - I guess being kidnapped together can make you tight quickly. It's not an overly violent kidnapping, and their captors aren't abusive or anything - they just take them to this weird cave out in the mountain wilderness. The media in Manilla posits that there is a white slavery ring in operation, although the real reason is even more bizarre. The secret mountain hideaway is actually the home of a cult that practices a strange religion - they worship a semi-alive head in a red cube (?) and feed on the vitality (i.e. blood) of young women to gain immortality. They don't outright kill their victims - just a little slice on the neck to bleed them every now and again. But perhaps a fate even worse than death awaits our heroes...

June 23rd, 2015 - The Dungeon of Harrow (1962)

I wish I knew what The Dungeon of Harrow even means (note the apostrophe in the title shot - which makes it even *more* confusing). "Harrow" is a word I was not familiar with. As in "harrowing" perhaps? Dungeon of "sorrow" would have made sense. (And a good metal song.) And the Olde English font isn't easily legible. Maybe it was supposed to be something else? I looked it up, and apparently a harrow is an agricultural tool, like a big frame with a lot of spikes that you drag behind a tractor to till the soil. That is not in this movie. The film is actually about the Count de Sade - a last name I've only heard in the context of Marquis de Sade. Which I've always heard pronounced as "De Saad" (i.e. rhyming with "pod"). Here, it rhymes with "paid."

The fact that I spent most of my time thinking about these trivial things instead of thinking "I like watching this movie" should tell you how interesting it is.

June 3rd, 2015 - The Embalmer (1965)

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