November 15th, 2015 - Eddie: The Sleepwalking Cannibal (2012)

The Sleepwalking Cannibal

Eddie: The Sleepwalking Cannibal seems to be going for some sort of grandiose statement about art, inspiration, and mortality. I guess it didn't work for me on that level... I just wasn't buying what it was selling. But thesis statement aside, it's still an okay (but slightly pretentious) watch. Not that it's super artsy - I mean, it's still more of a comedy than anything, and it succeeds mostly on that front. Maybe I just hate art?

Thure Lindhardt plays Lars, a famous Danish painter whose artistic output has taken a nosedive; he hasn't painted anything in 10 years (although to me he looked too young for that, but whatever). Lars is looking for a change of pace, and finds it by getting a job teaching in a small art school - I'm guessing in small town Canada (Eddie is a Danish/Canadian co-production), although I don't think it's ever specifically mentioned. Anyways, one of the quirks of the school is Eddie - a strange, mute man (some would probably call him "simple") whose parents died when he was very young. Eddie's aunt is a big benefactor of the school, and they let him hang out there as a gesture of goodwill. But when Eddie's aunt dies, she wants to leave her inheritance to the school - on the condition that they take care of Eddie. And for whatever reason (I guess so there's a movie), they decide it would be best for Eddie to stay with Lars.

February 26th, 2015 - Donner Pass (2012)

It's kind of weird how closely Donner Pass resembled yesterday's film (Legend of Sorrow Creek). Four kids, isolated in a remote wilderness home, looking for a good time, run afoul of some evil and start getting killed. I mean, that probably describes about 20% of horror movies, but still - I'm having a bit of a tough time keeping them separate in my head. The big difference is that Legend was more supernatural-based and Donner Pass is more psycho-cannibal-guy-in-the-woods based, with a little dash of the supernatural thrown in the mix. I mean, the *big* difference is that Legend was mostly enjoyable, and Donner Pass really isn't.

Donner Pass stars with a quick and liberally-interpreted retelling of the infamous Donner Party story. (In the 1840's, a group of pioneers was traveling through the Sierra Nevada mountains, ran afoul of some bad weather, were stranded and out of supplies, and resorted to eating members of their party who had died of natural causes.) Here though, one guy is crazy and kills people; eating them alive in a very zombie/gut-munching style. It's kind of gory, really.

October 27th, 2014 - The Vampires Night Orgy (1974)

The Vampires Night Orgy has a pretty misleading title.   Not to get all horndog on you, but you figure that a mid-70's Vampire movie with "orgy" in the title is going to be a little sexually charged.  But not here - you've got a peeper, a little bit of nudity, and that's about it.  It must be going along with the classic definition of orgy - per freedictionary.com: uncontrolled or immoderate indulgence in an activity.   In this case, the activity is the killing of a bus load of people traveling through the Spanish (I think) countryside.

Also, the grammatical vagueness and the lack of an apostrophe in the title is getting to me.  Is it an orgy on the night of the vampires?  Is it a night orgy involving vampires?  Inquiring minds want to know!  It is listed on the box (50 Tales of Terror) as Vampire's Night Orgy, which kind of makes sense - it is the Night Orgy of at least one Vampire.   On imdb, it is listed as The Vampires' Night Orgy, which is probably the best (it's the Night Orgy of several Vampires) but looks stupid.  In the movie itself it is listed as The Vampires Night Orgy, which I've been thinking about for several days (seriously) and am having trouble unpacking.  I'm a bad English Major.  But I've already spent too much time on thinking about this movie that was just passable at best.

October 26th, 2014 - Frightmare (1974)

There are apparently several movies called Frightmare.  I guess it's an easy pun - apparently there are a bunch of episodes of TV shows that go by the name too.  There was one a.k.a Horror Star from 1983 (per imdb: "Drama students decide to pay tribute to their favorite horror star by stealing his body from his crypt for a farewell party."  Presumably horrific shenanigans ensue.)  Another a.k.a. Paranoid  from 2000 ("A group of high school seniors put on a haunted house to raise money... when 3 people are killed, they hunt for a serial killer before the haunted house is shut down.")  The one I watched for today is a.k.a Cover Up, and is about a crazy cannibal woman and her estranged family.  Odd that not even one is about dreaming, but I guess Frightmare is generic enough.  Oddly enough, there is no Frighttime or Nightscare...