October 15th, 2015 - Hardware (1990)

I've heard a lot about director Richard Stanley in the last year or so. The 2014 documentary about his ill-fated attempt at making The Island of Dr. Moreau (called Lost Soul) is supposed to be really good, and I'm looking forward to checking it out. And despite a small body of work (two feature films and several shorts), he's the type of filmmaker that often gets the "visionary" label. Before today, I had only seen Dust Devil (I really liked it), but now having seen Hardware (his first feature) as well, I'm on board with the "visionary" thing. While people have (maybe rightfully) criticized Hardware for being a bit boring in the story department, it's clear that the story/characters are not really where Stanley's interests lie. It's the kind of film that really bears the filmmaker's fingerprints... and in this case, those fingerprints are a unique post-apocalyptic/creepy vibe and generally drugged-out feeling. Hardware exists in a well-constructed universe - a grimy, cyberpunkish sort of place; one of the characters makes art from welding scraps of metal and old machinery together - that actually describes the tone of the film better than anything. And as weird as it sounds, that tone is the film's strength.

And, the gory bits. Gore is far from plentiful in Hardware, but when it hits, it counts. It was listed in the horror category on Netflix, but I usually see it classified as an action/thriller. And that sort of misses the point - if you go in expecting action and crazy set-pieces, you'll be disappointed. It doesn't seem like the budget was there to do anything too crazy action-wise, and at any rate it would feel out of place. That just isn't what the film *is* - and they wisely don't try to force anything where it doesn't fit.

September 27th, 2015 - Slime City Massacre (2010)

I remember reading about this film a couple of years back and mentally filing it away on my "maybe watch" list. But you couldn't rent the DVD on Netflix, and it wasn't enticing enough to buy online. But when I was visiting a buddy out in California and came across the Special Edition used for $7.99 at Streetlight records in San Jose, I had to pick it up. And if I knew then what I know now (i.e. that I wouldn't like it very much), I probably would have passed. But still, I've got fond memories of that record store, even if Slime City Massacre ended up being a bust.

Also, I wish I had paid more attention when I read about it - apparently this is the sequel to 1988's Slime City. I highly doubt that seeing the original would make all that much of a difference (Massacre feels pretty self-contained), but still. It's good to be informed. That being said, the original is now pretty low on my "maybe watch" list. And that's a damned big list.

July 27th, 2015 - Parasite (1982)

Except for the couple of times that a nasty worm thing is graphically popping out of someone's body, Parasite is a mostly slow, kind of unexciting film that just didn't click for me. It's got a kind of interesting premise and (cheap) post-apocalyptic feel, but ultimately it doesn't have the budget, humor, or panache to make it work or ever elevate it above a crummy B-movie. And unfortunately, there isn't much of the B-movie charm you'd hope for from a 3D Charles Band film. Oh well.

Parasite is about a scientist named Paul Dean... he's been working on some sort of government project (presumably - you have to just infer a lot of stuff about the story here) involving - you guessed it - a parasite. But when he accidentally infects himself, he goes on the run with a bunch of medical equipment and a thermos with a living sample in it. I guess his bosses just want to kill him (and actually send some guy in a fancy ass car to chase him down), so he needs to find an isolated place where we can shack up, do some science, and hopefully get the parasite out of him.

March 25th, 2015 - Hell (2011)

As someone who has never been a big fan of the sun - it's too bright! - I appreciated the central concept of Hell. For some reason (solar flares?), the sun freaks out and the temperature on earth goes up by 10 degrees celsius, since it's a German film. (About 50 degrees Fahrenheit.) It's sunny and hot enough to make it dangerous to go outside unexposed, and water has become extremely scarce. Most people have died, and social order has completely broken down. So really, it's a post-apocalyptic style flick, but the reason behind the apocalypse is a consistent threat. Although of course people are the *real* threat to the survivors, yadda yadda yadda. Oh, and since it's not America, no one really has guns, so that's cool.

And Hell is a pretty solid film. The story isn't radical by any means - it starts with three survivors in an old car, in search of ever dwindling supplies (water, food, gasoline). But it's the sort of story that is best discovered on your own. A synopsis won't do it any favors. And a lot of what works in Hell isn't the basic story - it's the little details. You see the ways that this solar disaster has affected people, and the clever ways in which they've responded. It's just kind of neat.