The House of Seven Corpses is about as good of a movie as you could hope for where nothing really happens in the first hour. It's never really a boring film, but when you look back it's actually kind of amazing how little actually occurs in the first two acts. And it doesn't make up for it with a crazy ending either... the ending is perfectly acceptable and in line with what you'd expect from a mid-70's horror film, but nothing to write home about. But in spite of it's relative slowness, The House of Seven Corpses ends up being a pretty easy watch. Just be prepared for a lot of waiting for something to happen.
Our groovy opening credits show a bunch of the former occupants of the house dying. I wasn't counting, but I'm going to go ahead and guess there were seven of them. It's a nice opening sequence - you get some 70's gore right out of the gate, and there is a stylish color scheme that accompanies each death. You never really see the culprit(s), and it's implied that there is something supernatural going on in some of the deaths. For instance, a former owner was found in a noose hanging from a giant chandelier, but no one is sure how she got there.
Anyways, we find out that the titular house has been rented out by a movie crew making a cheap gothic horror flick, partially based on the history of the house. The caretaker of the house (John Carradine, seeming a bit more interested than some of the other cheap horror movies I've seen him in) gives them a tour, explaining where and how everyone died. Some of the cast and crew are bothered by this ghoulish history, while others seem to think it's sort of neat. When one of the assistants finds a shelf full of books about black magic in the reading room, it's only a matter of time until some of it is read aloud and the shit hits the fan.
But a long matter of time. Like over an hour. It's weird because you totally know it's coming. One of the assistants starts reading the Tibetan Book of the Dead every night - eventually suggesting that they use it in the film. And of course, there are several ominous shots of the graveyard on the house grounds. So you know that there is going to be some undead action, but The House of Seven Corpses takes it's sweet time getting there.
But luckily, the behind the scenes drama while the film within a film is being shot is relatively engaging. John Ireland is fun as the assholish director Eric Hartman - he's a bit too much of a dick at times, but reels it in enough that he never seems like a caricature. Faith Domergue is good as the leading lady Gayle Dorian (and Hartman's former lover) - she's got a little prima donna thing going on, but is also (correctly) the one the most worried about the house. And there's a little nuance in her performance too. There's some meta-business going on here; Hartman gives Dorian a hard time about being a "former beauty" and being too old for a leading lady (she was 50 at the time) - and incidentally this was one of her last roles. Generally speaking, it's fun to watch actors play actors/filmmakers - they seem to enjoy playing up/skewering aspects of the business that they are a part of, and that fun usually translates to the viewer.
Horror-wise? Most of the film, you don't get anything that is startling or suspenseful - you kind of know where things are heading as soon as you read the synopsis. The last 30 minutes or so have some okayish cheap-looking zombie thrills and a little tension, but it's all pretty tame in the grand scheme of things. The house is probably the star of the show. It's big and creepy and it's shot well. They have wisely done away with any electric lights - so the house is covered in shadows from the moonlight and candles at night. There are a couple of brief shots of shadows moving around the house that are just fantastic.
I guess if you are a cat fan you should probably stay away. Dorian has a little feline friend that gets it pretty bad in what passes as the only action in the first hour of the film. You don't see anything happen and the aftermath is obviously fake, but it's still pretty jarring. Although I guess if you were a cat lover you'd be worried about any house that had this hanging on the wall:
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| Just a framed picture of Hell, with Satan just hanging out there, and a prominently featured bloody cat head impaled on a pitchfork |
And as a side note - if you are a boutique poster maker or something, it's be pretty rad to sell some of the artwork from these old horror films. I'm not sure if I could talk the wife into putting this one up above the mantle... but it's still be pretty cool. And I *would* buy the one from Manos.
Overall, I didn't think all that much of The House of Seven Corpses right after I watched it, but it's grown on me a little as I've been thinking about it. It's still pretty slow at times, but the film-within-a-film thing is pretty entertaining.
I would kind of recommend this film.
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