November 10th, 2014 - The Phantom of Soho (1963)

The Phantom of Soho is okay. There isn't much to write about when you think a movie is just okay... and The Phantom of Soho is okay. Obviously, I'm having some issues here... It's my second krimi (German crime film based on the works of an Edgar Wallace - in this case his less prolific son Bryan) - after The Bloody Dead / The Blue Hand. It had a lot of the typical crime fiction trappings - a number of suspects, red herrings, several deaths, a last minute reveal. While this was not quite as enjoyable as The Blue Hand, it was still... okay.

We start in a seedy area in the Soho district of London (I didn't know that there were multiple Sohos). Most of the action takes place in and around a high profile strip club/brothel. A couple of high profile people turn up murdered, stabbed in the stomach and always left with some sort of trinket or money in their hands. The local media are up in arms and dub the killer "The Phantom of Soho." We follow around our two policemen from Scotland Yard as they attempt to solve the case. Eventually, they find that the murders are *not* random, and find a shady insurance deal could be behind it all. Nothing is more exciting than insurance! The cops also have to deal with their oft-absent Chief, who seems more interested in hanging out with a young, attractive crime novelist who thinks she can help solve the case.

And eventually, the case gets solved. So if you like the type of mystery movie where you get to find out who the killer is at the end, The Phantom of Soho might be for you! (Sorry, I revert to bad jokes when I don't know what to say.)

The most entertaining aspect of this film for me was definitely the two cops on the case. One is a bit older - in an American cop movie you could pretty much guarantee there would be some "I'm getting to old for this" type line. He's the straight man, and his bespectacled and derby-hatted, bowtie-clad partner is the comic relief. He's got this ultra-dry British sense of humor... injecting "mate" and "sir" into just about every line, constantly removing and replacing his hat, and just being prim and proper yet still vaguely wacky all of the time.

My new favorite buddy cops.

Although this could be on accident... this was in German originally, and whoever did the dubbing did a really good job matching up the English lines with the lips moving. I watched in on my "50 Tales of Terror" budget pack, so the resolution was not very good, and I honestly wouldn't have known it was in another language if I didn't read up on it a bit after the fact. I wonder if they threw in all of the extra "sirs,""chaps," and other inane dialogue to make the lip movements match up. So while I would probably pay (a little) money to see these guys team up on another case, it would be on the condition that it's dubbed by the same folks that did this one.

The mystery is okay - but it's one of those movies where they just kill off everyone until there's really only one person left who could be the killer. From reading reviews online it sounds like many people were surprised, but I had it figured out pretty early on. (Not to brag, or anything. Usually I'm terrible at that kind of stuff.)

The blurbs and posters about this movie talk up the terrifying killer in a skull mask. But, despite being a focal point in all of the advertising, it's never really in the film for more than a couple of seconds in one scene. And it's not really scary. Most of our kills are of the "first-person but still off camera" variety - there is a quick stab towards the victim's stomach and that's that. Not really gory in any way. The only identifying characteristic of the killer that we see is a pair of gold sequined gloves. Because gloves are scary?

So, whatever. It's not terrible, but I can't really recommend it unless you're a big fan of the krimi films.

I would   not recommend   this film.